Tag: recovery

  • Your Past May Have Wounded You

    Your past may have wounded you, but it does not have to determine your future. God can take what has been broken and bring restoration from it. The goal isn't simply to take a broken life and make it comfortable. It's to allow Jesus to transform that life so deeply that His work becomes visible through it.

    A wound can affect the way you live today. Past abuse and emotional wounds can affect how someone sees themselves, relationships, trust, love, and even their ability to receive God's love. Meyer also discusses destructive coping behaviors that can develop as people try to escape emotional pain.

    You have to acknowledge the pain. Healing doesn't come from pretending nothing happened. Painful memories and emotions need to be brought into God's presence rather than continually buried.

    What happened to you is not your identity. A major part of healing is separating what happened from who you are.

    Instead of: “I am damaged.”

    the journey becomes: “I was wounded, but Jesus is healing me.”

    God's unconditional love is essential. Meyer emphasizes learning to receive God's love rather than believing you have to earn it. Shame, guilt, rejection, and feeling unworthy can keep people from receiving the love God freely gives.

    Healing also involves personal responsibility.

    This is an important distinction: You are not responsible for what happened to you, but you are responsible for what you choose to do with your life moving forward. Healing involves taking ownership of our attitudes, choices, behaviors, forgiveness, and relationship with God. What happened may be part of your story, but it does not have to define your future. Through Jesus, you can choose healing, growth, accountability, and a new way of living.

    Forgiveness is part of freedom. Forgiveness doesn't mean pretending the abuse was acceptable or allowing someone to continue harming you. It means releasing the person and the situation to God instead of allowing the offense to continue controlling your life.

    Don't rush God's healing process. Some memories and wounds take time to work through. Meyer specifically emphasizes the importance of God's timing when dealing with painful memories.

    Don't rush God's healing process. Some memories and wounds take time to work through. Healing is a process, and we must allow God to work in His timing as we learn to face painful memories, process our emotions, and surrender our wounds to Him.

    God can redeem your story. This is really the heart of the title.

    Ashes represent what was burned, broken, destroyed, or lost. Beauty represents what God can build from it.

    The goal isn't to erase your history. It's to allow God to use your history without allowing your history to control you.

    Old → New

    2 Corinthians 5:17 — New Creation

    Ephesians 4:22–24

    Colossians 3:9–10 — Old Self → New Self

    Broken → Restored

    Psalm 147:3

    Jeremiah 30:17

    Joel 2:25

    Death → Life

    Romans 6:4

    Galatians 2:20

    Romans 12:2

    Shame → Freedom

    Romans 8:1

    John 8:36

    Isaiah 43:18–19

    Mourning → Joy

    Psalm 30:5

    Psalm 40:1–3

    Redemption

    1 Peter 5:10

    Romans 8:28

    “Surrender your old life to Jesus, allow Him to transform you, and learn to walk in the new life He has given you.”

  • Facing Fear in Recovery

    Fear is one of the enemy’s favorite tools. It whispers lies that sound like truth: you’re not strong enough, you’ll never change, it’s safer to go back to what you know. But fear is not from God. “For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind” (2 Timothy 1:7).

    I know fear. I lived in it for years. Fear of being honest about who I’d become. Fear of walking into a room and admitting I needed help. Fear that if people really knew me, they’d walk away. And underneath all of it, the biggest fear of all: that I’d try to get clean and fail again.

    But here’s what I learned: fear loses its power the moment you bring it into the light.

    Name What You’re Afraid Of

    Fear grows in the dark. When you keep it locked inside, it gets bigger and louder. But when you name it out loud — to God, to a trusted friend, to your sponsor — it starts to shrink. You can’t fight an enemy you won’t face. So be honest with yourself: what are you really afraid of? Change? Failing? Being seen? Write it down. Say it out loud. Drag it into the light.

    Remember Who Goes With You

    Fear tells you you’re alone. That’s a lie. “Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you, yes, I will help you, I will uphold you with My righteous right hand” (Isaiah 41:10). You don’t have to be fearless — you just have to remember who’s holding you. Courage isn’t the absence of fear. It’s moving forward with God while your knees are still shaking.

    Take the Next Small Step

    Fear wants you frozen. It wants you so overwhelmed by everything ahead that you do nothing at all. Don’t look at the whole mountain — just take the next step. Make the call. Go to the meeting. Tell one person the truth. Small obedience builds big faith, and every step you take in spite of fear is a victory.

    Let Go of the “What Ifs”

    Fear lives in the future — in all the what-ifs that haven’t happened and probably never will. But God only gives grace for today. “Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about its own things” (Matthew 6:34). Stay in today. Handle what’s in front of you. Let God handle what’s ahead of you.

    Lean on Your People

    God never meant for us to do this alone. Find people who will pray with you, check on you, and tell you the truth when fear is lying to you. Isolation is where fear thrives; community is where it dies.

    Fear knocked on my door for years, and for a long time I let it in and gave it a seat at my table. Not anymore. I still feel fear sometimes — but now I know what to do with it. I hand it to God and keep walking.

    You can too.

  • Letting Go

    What does this term mean? What specifically are you letting go of? Letting go means different things for different people but overall it means letting go of old, worn out patterns of behavior that no longer suit you in recovery.

    Letting go of people, places, and things that jeopardize your recovery efforts. Letting go of self-doubt and self-blame that keep you stuck. Letting go of pride and perfectionism, which are unrealistic expectations of yourself. Letting go of negative thoughts and feelings that no longer serve you.

    How does one “let go”? This will be a different answer for each person. Letting go is not just about letting go of your addiction but letting go of old behaviors that kept you in the addiction. You let go by not being hard on yourself during recovery. There are challenges that everyone faces in recovery and you do not need to change everything overnight. Allow yourself the time to heal and to rediscover yourself.

    Let go of the blame game and focus on what you are grateful for in recovery. Blaming others for your hardships during recovery hurts only yourself. There are ups and downs in recovery, just like in life. Let go by allowing life to happen and understand that you are only in control of yourself, not others.

    Let go of the anger you have and the guilt and shame you carry around with you. Instead, begin to heal the wounds of past relationships by talking to a professional counselor or better, talking to the individual that you have hurt directly by your addiction. Let go of the need to compare yourself to others. This happens quite a bit in recovery as many compare number of days, weeks, months, or years of sobriety that someone else has. Be happy for them, learn from them but focus on your time. Whatever you have is an accomplishment.

    No person on this planet is perfect. Let go of trying to be perfect in all areas of your life. Give life your all, learn from your experiences, and set realistic goals. Be humble, live simply, and learn to forgive.

    Letting Go in Recovery

    In many ways, recovery is a process of letting go. It is not just letting go of the addiction itself, but also the behaviors that enable it. Some of the things you must release in order to progress in recovery include:

    Being a victim: Addiction is painful and many who struggle with it believe they have been victimized. Addiction hurts more than just the person who is affected by it—their family and loved ones are also often exposed to pain and struggle as a result. Avoiding the victim mentality is critical, and letting go of it is just as important. It does not contribute positively to recovery. Rather than falling into that mindset, focus on what makes you happy and list the things for which you are grateful. This can help keep things in perspective when times get tough.

    Beating yourself up: Everyone makes mistakes and often those in recovery struggle with letting go of their past. Similarly to the victim mindset, beating yourself up for past actions or experiences does not contribute positively to recovery. Rather than focusing on things you cannot change, focus on how you can learn and grow from those experiences. Calling yourself names, or thinking poorly of yourself—especially if you have experienced relapse—will not help you get back on feet. Recovery is not easy, and beating yourself up will not make the process more successful.

    Comparing yourself to others: It can be easy to lose sight of your progress when you continuously compare yourself to others. Each person is in a different stage of recovery and has varying experiences. It is also easy to view other people’s lives unrealistically. This is especially true when viewing others through the lens of social media or online representation. People often only share what they want others to know, and can leave out the other, less positive aspects of their lives.

    Trying to be perfect: It is impossible to be perfect, and the journey in recovery will not be without mistakes or steps back. It is important to consider the bigger picture and how everything contributes to your overall success. Without mistakes or setbacks, you would be unable to learn and grow as a result. Giving your all, learning from your experiences, and setting realistic goals is the best you can do.

    Waiting until the right moment: There is no such thing as “the right time”. People may put off entering recovery because they are waiting for what they think is the right time, but truthfully, there is no perfect moment. Achieving sobriety is a decision you should make now. There is no right time; getting help for addiction does not become easier as more time passes. The sooner you begin your journey, the sooner you can enjoy the successes of sobriety.